Stop bullying its tracks

District Attorney Summer Stephan has dedicated nearly 30 years to serving justice and victims of crime as prosecutor.

Summer Official with Flag_preview.jpeg
District Attorney Summer Stephan

As your District Attorney, I’m committed to increasing communication and accessibil­ity between the DA’s Office and you, the community. One way I have been doing that is through this monthly column, where I provide consumer tips on public safety matters.

It’s nearly impossible to go through school without hav­ing been exposed to bullying. As a victim, a perpetrator or a bystander, bullying has short term and long term effects on all of us. Studies show that one in five students reported being bullied in school. Although it’s a common phenomenon, its ef­fects are serious. At its most se­vere, it causes depression, anxi­ety, isolation, poor performance in school and suicidal thoughts.

One of my priorities as Dis­trict Attorney is making sure our youth have opportunities to thrive and stay out of the juvenile justice system. That’s why we spend so much time on preventative programs and out­reach in our juvenile division.

Here, I’d like to leave tips for what to do if you are bullied, if your child is bullying or if you see bullying happen. But first, it’s important to know what bullying is. It’s when you are repeatedly exposed to harass­ment or attacks by one or more students. It comes in direct or indirect forms. This isn’t friend­ly banter; it’s an imbalance of power where the subject finds it hard to defend him or herself.

If you’re bullied:

  • Walk away. If possible, re­move yourself from the situa­tion immediately
  • Say “stop” in a calm but firm voice if it feels safe to do so
  • Stay calm
  • Do not fight or bully back

If your child is a bully, you can:

  • Enforce family rules
  • Encourage, reinforce and reward empathy and kind be­havior
  • Spend time with your child at their school and in extra-cur­ricular activities
  • Partner with the school to develop an intervention plan
  • Seek professional help if necessary

If you see bullying:

  • Tell an adult that you trust (parent, teacher, school coun­selor, or a family friend)
  • Tell a friend and ask for sup­port
  • If your friend tells you they were bullied, listen to them. Tell them you care about them and help them find an adult they can talk to
  • Speak up. Do not stand by and watch someone get bullied

Cyber-bullying tips for par­ents:

  • Monitor your child’s cell phone and social media ac­counts
  • If you allow your child to have a cell phone or participate in social media websites, ensure you have the password to their phone as well as their password to every social media app
  • Have privacy settings, but remember even friends can share your child’s private posts by taking a screenshot
  • It is common for kids to have more than one account on a so­cial media site
  • Online bullying through so­cial media hurts and harms a child as much as if it were done in person

Finally, bullying can lead to criminal conduct. Consider this: 60 percent of boys who were ag­gressors in middle school had at least one criminal conviction by age 24. In addition, adoles­cents who bully others tend to exhibit other defiant and de­linquent behaviors, have poor school performance, are more likely to drop-out of school, and are more likely to bring weap­ons to school. Parents who no­tice these characteristics in their children should address it.

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