There are four stages of achieving competency in anything that you are learning. It can be anything from riding a bicycle to learning a computer program. These four stages are: 1. Unconscious Incompetence 2. Conscious Incompetence 3. Conscious Competence 4. Unconscious Competence. If you take a few moments to let each one of those sink in I’m sure you can recall going through each one on your way to competency.
As we take the 21 Day No Complaint Challenge, we move through these four stages. I started the program 16 days ago but am currently on day two. Therefore you can tell I’m in stage two. I’m consciously aware that I am incompetent at not complaining. As I read through Will Bowen’s “A Complaint Free World” book, I discovered the “excuse” I was using when I made what I called a statement of fact or an exclamation (these are usually when I’m watching a Padre game) didn’t hold water. In other words he says: “Whether or not a statement reflects a complaint depends on whether the speaker is experiencing a internal dissatisfaction. Therefore, it’s a complaint if you want the person or situation changed. If you want it other than it is, it’s a complaint and not just a statement of fact.” Darn it and rats! Oh – wait – that was a complaint! O.K. Back to day 1 again.
Winston Churchill said: “Success is going from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm.” Therefore I am enthusiastic about becoming Consciously Competent and ultimately Unconscious Competency at not complaining.
This process is deep seated in nature. It brings up our insecurities and our lack of self esteem and even our “victimhood” type of mentalities. Know you are worth letting go of complaining and having to have things go your way. You are a magnificent expression of the Divine, made in God’s image, and therefore worthy in every way.
Say with me: “I am waking up to letting go of upset. God is in charge and my life is lead and moved by God’s loving hand. I am happy to speak kind, loving and supportive words. I sink into the realization that all is truly well. And it is so.”
— Rev. Gay Beauregard, Alpine Church of Spiritual Living.
